CHICAGO—Considering what he presumed was probably the most sought-after meals in all town, native man Ron Steward informed reporters Wednesday {that a} pizza slice at John’s Pizza & Extra needed to be actually scrumptious to be served from behind bulletproof glass.“Whoa, that’s acquired to be one extremely tasty pizza slice in the event that they thought thieves would attempt to take it by power,” stated Steward, speculating that the coveted pizza was almost definitely stored in a vault throughout off-hours and taken care of by 5 or 6 armed guards to forestall it from falling into the incorrect fingers. “They in all probability have some sort of alarm system rigged up so even a slight change in stress beneath the heating lamps alerts them to a possible heist. I didn’t even know a slice that good existed. Perhaps it’s from the British royal pizza assortment?” Steward added that it was particularly odd that such safety was wanted, because the pizza seemed to be obtainable for a mere $4.99 with a can of soda.