In a narrative that’ll make you go, “Oh, honey,” rising from Austin, TX, 34-year-old Brian Fairchild simply grew a beard and justified it by saying, “Beards are make-up for males,” which misses the purpose: he ought to actually simply attempt make-up.
“Yeah, I made a decision to develop on this ‘ol factor as a result of I hear it’s the equal of a lady carrying a little bit rouge and a staple lip,” Brian advised his group of pals, shocking everybody by revealing he knew the phrases “rouge” and “staple lip.” “Or…uh…that’s what I’ve heard. It’s make-up for males.”
Brian’s pals appeared involved by the implication that he was going to nice lengths to keep away from simply carrying make-up.
“I don’t know if he realizes that ‘make-up’ can be make-up for males,” mentioned Brian’s buddy Tina Wu. “He is aware of he can do no matter he desires, proper? I worry for him. He’s created this field for himself regardless that nobody would bat a watch if he began carrying a little bit basis right here and there. Actually, I believe it could actually even out his pores and skin tone!”
When requested in regards to the distinction between common make-up and make-up for males, cosmetics govt Li Wendt mentioned, “What? There may be none. ‘Common make-up’ is make-up for males. Who despatched you?”
In the meantime, Brian was busy gushing about how cute he felt in his new beard, even when he would possibly really feel cuter if he actually simply tried make-up as soon as.
“It simply elevates the look, you understand?” he mentioned, checking himself out within the mirror. “Not as a lot as a little bit little bit of primer or possibly a pores and skin tint would elevate it, but it surely’s nonetheless one thing.”
At this level, Brian’s pals set free a collective, “Come on, man.”
“It’s vital that I discover methods to precise myself,” Brian continued. “However not any method that’ll make individuals go, ‘Is that man carrying make-up?’ Even when after that, they’d say, ‘Rattling, he seems to be actually good in it!’”
In keeping with Brian, he spent about $200 on beard upkeep merchandise, from excessive finish shaving cream to a beard trimmer, which was disappointing contemplating how far that $200 would have gotten him at Sephora.
“We’re speaking a full face of merchandise if he simply wasn’t such a scaredy cat,” Tina continued. “I’m pissed.”
As of press time, Brian was telling his pals he wished there have been a option to make his curls actually pop, however “sadly curl cream can be made just for girls.”