Welcome to the CBS Information vice-presidential debate. To combine it up tonight, we grabbed this sort and empathetic Everyman, Tony, off the road and put him in a go well with. He’s an absolute loser, however with an extremely distinctive ability. He has the worst poker face in America, as you may see. There is not going to be a truth verify of any kind tonight, however Tony will likely be offering a vibe verify. “What’s a vibe verify?” Learn the cardboard, Tony. “OK. Normally, a vibe verify is a fast evaluation to see if everybody’s having an excellent time on the bar. However tonight, it’s extra simply taking the temperature on whether or not our Republic will nonetheless exist in 4 years. My God.” “Tonight, our nation is going through a number of unfolding crises. The Center East is getting ready to struggle. People are affected by the catastrophic impression of Hurricane Helene.” “And to begin with, thanks, Governor, due to CBS for internet hosting the talk.” “Aw.” “And thanks, most significantly, to the American people who find themselves watching this night.” “And I don’t essentially disagree with that.” “I really suppose — I agree with you. I believe you need to resolve this downside, however I don’t suppose that Kamala Harris does.” “— the proper of this. I agree with a number of what Senator Vance stated about what’s occurring.” “It is a debate, proper?” “They have been mistaken about that.” [MUMBLING] “They have been mistaken about the concept if we made — However I sadly suppose that we’ve to extend safety in our colleges. Now we have to make the doorways lock higher. Now we have to make the doorways stronger. We’ve bought to make the home windows stronger.” [MOANING] “The concept that we might magically wave a wand and take weapons out of the palms of dangerous guys, it simply doesn’t match with current expertise, so we’ve bought to make our colleges safer. And I believe we’ve bought to have some frequent sense, bipartisan options.” “In Congress, I used to be one of the bipartisan individuals.” “Hmm.” “So I’ve change into associates with faculty shooters. Properly, in fact, that’s not true. And once more, you’ve the details. I assume we agreed to not truth verify. I’ll verify it.” “Now we have a lot to get to.” “Margaret, I believe it’s vital, as a result of the talk —” “We’re going to show now to the economic system. Thanks.” “Margaret, the principles have been that you simply guys weren’t going to truth verify.” “The economic system —” “And because you’re truth checking, I believe it’s vital to say what’s really happening.” “Wait, so we’re not checking — we’re not checking — we’re not checking details?” “I hope not.” “Are we nonetheless checking vibes?” “There’s little doubt, this factor roared onto the scene sooner and stronger than something we’ve seen.” “OK.” “Precisely.” “Vibes clearly are nonetheless good.” “Completely.” “To begin with, Governor, I agree with you.” “Good God, sufficient with the niceties. Let’s hear some insults.” “I’ve not been excellent, and I’m a knucklehead at instances.” “No, no, no. Insult him.” “No.” “I’ve seen what you’ve stated about him.” “Right here’s what you gained’t hear is — — and I’ve bought three stunning little youngsters at dwelling.” [MUSIC PLAYING] “(SINGING) Three stunning little youngsters to a phenomenal spouse My grandmother raised me, a phenomenal spouse, stunning spouse I grew up in a small city I agree I joined the Nationwide Guard, it’s all the time been about that life Lovely spouse” “Gents, the viewers can’t hear you as a result of your mics are lower.” “And I don’t essentially disagree with that.” “Properly, to begin with, Tim simply stated one thing that I agree with.” “Properly, I’ve loved tonight’s debate, and I believe there was a number of commonality right here. And I’m sympathetic to misspeaking —” “God, what’s nice-guy stuff?” “— on issues I believe I might need — with the senator.” “Me too, man.” “However there’s one —” “God, I do know you don’t agree!” “And I’m going to thank Senator Vance. I believe that is the dialog they need to hear. And I believe there’s a number of settlement.” “This isn’t a date, it’s a debate!” “I believe that is the dialog they need to hear.” “Donald Trump stated protesters ought to peacefully protest on January the sixth.” “That is one which we’re miles aside on.” “OK.” “He’s nonetheless saying he didn’t lose the election. I’d simply ask you that. Did he lose the 2020 election?” “Tim, I’m targeted on the longer term.” “Oh my God, I need to speak in regards to the future, however that’s not what we’re speaking about.” “Would you, once more, search to problem this yr’s election outcomes?” “We have to determine the right way to resolve the inflation disaster brought on by Kamala Harris’s insurance policies. Did Kamala Harris censor People within the wake of the 2020 COVID state of affairs?” “Nope.” “It’s now time for the closing statements. Senator Vance?” “Properly, I need to thank Governor Walz, you people at CBS, and naturally, the American individuals for tuning on this night.” “OK, right here’s my present vibe verify. These closing statements felt a bit of rehearsed. However you recognize what? On the finish of the day, I’m so grateful to be part of this night time, this sacred pillar of our democracy. This —” “And most significantly, thanks to all of you. Should you’re nonetheless up and the oldsters who missed ‘Dancing with the Stars,’ I admire it.” “I missed ‘Dancing with the Stars?’ O.Ok. [MUTED]:” [MUSIC PLAYING] “(SINGING) It’s all the time been about that life, stunning spouse.” “I really suppose I agree with you. (SINGING) Lovely spouse.”
