“We’ve been ready for Ozzy for a while, seeing as he did signal that contract. I get all of them right here, it’s like a Casablanca Information music biz board assembly from the Seventies generally.
“Anyway, as quickly as he bloody turns up, very first thing he does is urinate over my throne. Then he takes out a straw from his pocket and begins snorting a load of ants up his fucking nostril off the ground. Sure, we do have ants down right here, in the event you have been questioning.
“We’re typically used to chaos, however Ozzy is sort of a brummie twister on crack. He even tried to chew the top off my favorite gargoyle, Frank. That’s after I needed to put my hoof down.
“Oi! Ozzy, that is my area. Now look over there, we’ve received a pleasant number of groupies by the jacuzzi, and there’s additionally an infinite queue of guitarists you’ll have to audition till the tip of time. Limitless provide of medication to the left, and any type of booze you need to the correct. Sorry concerning the jukebox on this space, it appears to be caught on Take That, however I’ve summoned up an engineer to have a look at the issue. Now get out of my sight, and cease drooling all around the fucking place. Go on, have some enjoyable, don’t fear, Sharon’s not right here …but.”